


don't be afraid of the way that you feel

by danhoweiis



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: M/M, Sexuality
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-12
Updated: 2019-03-12
Packaged: 2019-11-16 06:08:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,120
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18088889
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/danhoweiis/pseuds/danhoweiis
Summary: late night blow jobs followed by late night chats





	don't be afraid of the way that you feel

**Author's Note:**

> title from mistakes by hippo campus  
> (maybe one of these days i won't use their lyrics as a fic title)

“You know I think I was actually born to suck dick.”

“I bet you say that to all the boys.” Phil said, trying not to laugh at his own joke.

Dan looked up at him, unable to hide the fondness on his face. Reason number 34 on a never ending list of reasons why Dan Howell loves Phil Lester; his inability to not laugh at his own jokes.

“You know very well I've only said that to you.”

“Shouldn't you have said ‘I was actually born to suck Phil Lester's dick' then?”

“Enough with the technicalities Mr linguistics degree and let me give you the blowjob to end all blowjobs.”

“Wow, get Mr Guinness in here.”

Dan's lips were just about to wrap around Phil’s cock when he paused to look up at Phil. “What?”

“You know...the guy who makes the Guinness book of world records.”

“I don't think it's called that because it's named after a man.”

“Oh. Is it named after the beer then?”

“No, I don't think s- LOOK can you just shut the eff up so I can suck your dick.”

-

“What could you possibly need to Google a mere 30 seconds after finishing sex?”

“Why the Guinness book of world records is called the Guinness book of world records.”

“You're intolerable. I'm gonna take a piss.” Dan said, pushing back the blanket and walking to the bathroom.

Dan was stood at the toilet enjoying a post sex piss when Phil banged loudly on the door and pushed it open.

“The idea for a book of records begins in the early 1950s when Sir Hugh Beaver (1890—1967), Managing Director of the Guinness Brewery, attends a shooting party in County Wexford. See, I was right!”

Dan stared at him, perplexed. “I'm literally peeing here could this not have waited?”

“Oh, sorry I was just excited.”

It’s not like Dan could be genuinely annoyed. Especially not when Phil had that wide, happy grin on his face.

“Go to bed you muppet. I’ll be back in literally 0.3 seconds and you can tell me all about Mr Guinness then.”

-

Dan came back to bed and lay on top of the covers next to Phil. 

“Now I'm actually in bed I don’t even feel tired.” Dan said into the empty room.

Phil was lying on his back and looking up at the ceiling when he spoke.

“Do you ever feel weird?”

There was silence. Dan shifted his eyes across to look at Phil who hadn’t moved a muscle. In fact if Dan didn’t know that it was Phil’s voice, he would have wondered where the sound had come from.

“Literally every day of my life. What's that got to do with the Guinness book of world records?” He replied, moving his gaze back to the ceiling.

“Nothing but...I meant, do you feel weird you’ve only been with me?”

“I had a girlfriend for 3 years, dumbass.” Dan had fully turned his head to look at Phil now. Engaged in whatever the hell this conversation turned out to be.

“I meant the only guy.”

“Oh, n-not really. Never really thought about it.” That was a lie. He’d thought about it many times. Thought about how it shaped his identity and did he really have any right to say he liked guys when he’d only been with Phil? That was probably one of the reasons the label bisexual never fitted him right.

“Really? You’ve never thought about being with another guy? Not even kissing another guy?”

Dan rolled his eyes. “Obviously. Just never wanted to. Got you haven’t I?” He said, prodding Phil’s arm. He quickly buried the thoughts he’d had for years. Thoughts about wanting to experiment before ‘settling down’ so to speak. Maybe he should try kissing other guys to check that he did actually like it and it wasn’t just a one time thing with Phil.  “Where’s all this come from anyway?”

“Just thinking. About what you said before, that my dick is the only one you’ve ever sucked.”

There was an alarm going off in Dan’s head now to deflect this potentially too deep late night chat with some humour.

He chuckled. “Look mate if this is gonna turn into some deep chat about my sexuality I am gonna need a lot more caffeine in my body for that.”

“No, no it’s not. It just- is it weird that I feel arrogant about that?”

 _Oh._ Not the direction Dan thought this conversation was going to go in.

“What? That your dick is the only one I want in my mouth?” Dan said with a chuckle.

“Well yeah that, but just that- I’m the only guy you’ve ever been with and want to be with.”

Dan sighed and rolled onto his back, his fingers interlocked across his stomach. Phil was insistent he’d give him that. Guess there was no room for deflecting tonight. “I don’t see it like that. You’re _Phil._ You’re not a guy you’re just Phil. And you happen to have a penis. And yes, men are unbelievably attractive and i have watched my fair share of gay porn over the years but that’s not why I fell in love with you. I fell in love with you because you’re Phil.”

“So nothing to do with what’s between my legs?”

Dan bit his lip, pretending to think. “Maybe the smallest amount. Plus those shirtless DailyBooth photos you insisted on posting just to taunt 18 year old Dan Howell who had no self control.”

Phil chuckled and shuffled across the bed so he was right up next to Dan. An arm wrapped tightly over his waist and his chin resting snugly against Dan’s shoulder. “Awh, that’s a cute mental image. You wanking over photos of me.”

“Wasn’t meant to be a compliment mate. In fact it’s a bit creepy considering you didn’t know who I was then.”

“I’m sure you had good intentions.”

Dan chuckled and pressed a kiss to Phil’s forehead. “Only good intentions for my dick.”

That earned Dan a pinch to the stomach, in which he yelped in response and pushed Phil away. “You mother-” He said, shaking his head and rubbing the skin that was now bright red.

“Want me to kiss it better?”

“Absolutely not you twat. I’m going to sleep.”

He pulled the covers up and over their bodies, tucking it up to his arms and snuggling right down underneath them so all that was poking out was his head.

Phil snickered as he did the same, pushing himself right up against Dan’s back and wrapping an arm across Dan’s waist.

“Night Dan, sweet dreams.” He said teasingly.

Dan scoffed lightly as he pulled Phil closer. “Yeah whatever.”

**Author's Note:**

> kudos/comments are appreciated !  
> find me on [twitter](https://twitter.com/danhoweIIs) / reblog on [tumblr](http://danhowellz.tumblr.com/post/183408979498/dont-be-afraid-of-the-way-that-you-feel)


End file.
